Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Back to ‘This’ Asylum


The ever present simmy music plays obliviously in the background. Drumming fingers are heard while the cursor hovers indecisively. Giggling and carrying on can be over heard as the familiar sounds get louder. “Oh for the love of…”


“Ruyb…” The impatient off screen voice tries uncessfully to get the hosts attention.
There is a short pause in the festivities. “Did you hear something?”
“Nothing important I’m sure.” The pause ends and the woohoo continues. The off screen voice sighs and shoos the hesitant camera crew across the street.


“Seeing how the whole crew is now starving from lack of food during their ‘Ack, fire’ dancing and the deaths. I opted to have Toots call for Chinese take out rather than trying to get everything cleaned up and cooking something.” The off voice pauses to admire the scenery.
The take out delivery guy pauses as the camera stares at him. He glances at the camera and the drooling woman directing them with a questioning smirk. “Excuse me, I have a deliver to make.” He eases past the crew to ring the door bell. Immediately he is given a sizable tip in order for Toots to get acquainted with the manbeast.
“Oh thanks! Um… I will call you later and we can talk.” She glares at Roo who simply grins. “Apparently we’re meant to be friends.” She takes the tray of food and gives him an awkward smile before heading back in to the building. “Food’s here!”


“Toots is pretty hungry after her long day of work, her near death and the constant interruptions to what she wants to do as opposed to what I need her to do. Trouble is, she is blocking the food and now no one gets to eat except for her.” The off screen voice can be heard sighing.


“The next couple of days or rather nights we get visitors. Not necessarily the ones I’d like to have visiting but when it comes to the dead, I am not given a choice in the matter. They simply show up when it suits them. While at times they simply cry over the injustice of it all, other times they take their frustrations out on the one who started it all.” The off screen voice can be heard chuckling at Christina’s latest visitor.


Frustrated, the cameras pan back across the street. “Ruyb, are you going to do your hosting job at all this update?”
Ruyb snuggles in to his arms, sighing blissfully. The off screen voice can be heard growling. Ruyb lifts her head to grin, “I only promised to do last update. I got what I wanted. You’re on your own now.”
“I gave him to you. I can take him away.”
Ruyb grins confidently. “You like him too much. Now don’t you have an update to do?” Once again, Ruyb gets comfortable in his arms enjoying how her body fits perfectly to his. The camera crew heads back to the other side of the street sans director with the sounds of tempers flaring in the background.


“So I told her that I put her guildie on ignore because no one gets snarky with me about my toon. I mean if I want to play destro then that’s what I’m going to play and it’s not as if I asked for her opinion either. I mean she just IM’s me to nag me. I don’t play to get nagged at. I play to have fun and that wasn’t fun. So later she’s all, oh I know who that is and ya a lot of people don’t like her because she does that. And um… oh ya? Hmmm… okay so I’ll talk to you later then.” Toots stares at the camera crew as she hangs up. “What?”
The cameraman simply shrugs silently and Toots sighs. “So I just talked to the fireman guy and the take out food guy. We’re friends enough that I can invite them over to get a better look at them. I dunno… neither one of them impressed me much.”


Ruyb’s voice suddenly comes across. “Toots was indeed meh over the Chinese take out guy which I think is hilarious. Roo was so annoyed and growling at Toots. Not that she listened or anything. Thing is when she invited the fireman over she was even less impressed with which had me cracking up. Two guys Roo wants for her to hook up with and Toots isn’t even remotely interested!”


“On the other hand Mitch was throwing some pink hearts at Christina so Toots took the opportunity to sit down and have a chat with them both. This way she started the ground work for their friendship. Who knows if more will come of it? I mean we have ACR still so anything can happen!”


“One day Toots actually brought someone home from work. Her first time and she brings home Aman Sim.” Ruyb smirks. “Roo cant stand him. Naturally she was growling at Toots again. Its not as if the woman can pick who she brings home. Anyhow she introduced him around to the other women and then had an at home outing.” There is a short pause as a thought occurs to Ruyb. “Yanno, while he was there he talked with Christina for a long while and even gave her something. It didn’t go in Toots’ backpack so Im not sure if it’s a stereo, television or a computer but still… if she dies does it go to someone else?”
“Ruyb! No one else is going to die.”
“Uh huh… that’s what you thought when you started phase 2. No one is gonna die.” Ruyb laughs at the off screen voice. “Famous last words.”


Ruyb scoffs. “Family sims. Any how she had plenty to celebrate. She is now promoted to Lieutenant. I think that’s level 7 in her career so she’s almost done.” Ruyb gets a look at Amin’s profile. “Now that is some nose.”


“So life goes on for the four ladies. Sorry this is such a short update but there weren’t any more… well, okay there was one more fire but it was small and it was started by Toots. That got put out rather quickly. See you next time. And remember… ‘This’.”

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Thursday, August 5, 2010

‘This’ smoldering Asylum


Sim music plays as the camera comes in to focus. No yelling is heard, no one appears to be missing any CC at the moment and the inmates, erm minionettes are a bit subdued due to their recent loss of their friend.


“There you are. We have an update to do.”
Ruyb continues to bathe and ignore the off camera voice. “Ruyb…”
“Hmm…”
“I said there is an update to do… get your ass out of the bath and lets do this.”
“I need you to do something for me.”
“Oh for the love of-” The off camera voice stops midsentence, silence is heard, not even a cricket is chirping. “Really?”
“Yes, really.” Ruyb puts the soap aside and stares, challenging the off camera voice. “You do that for me and I’ll cooperate.”
“Interesting… consider it done. Now get out of the tub and let’s get this started.”


Ruyb smiles for the camera as she comes in to view. “Welcome back to ‘This Asylum’ where no one fights, everyone knows how to cook and other than a few aspiration concerns they appear to all be rather content.” She sighs for a moment, her smile slips and she shrugs at the off camera voice. “I can only be chipper and bubbly for short periods of time without some drama to keep me interested. So what’s next?”
“I’m not sure but I would guess the title should be some indication of what’s next.”
“Sweet!”


“Toots is plugging along at her required three skills for her LTW of Capt. Simarica.”
“It’s not Cap-tain Sim-ar-i-ca.” Toots manages to speak each syllable in rhythm with her hops. “It’s Cap-tain He-ro!”
Ruyb smirks, “Easy for you to say.”
“Not real-ly. I just don’t want to have to start all o-ver a-gain.”
Ruyb stares at the off camera voice. “I’m supposed to work with this?”
“Mhmm… we made a deal.”


Ruyb takes a deep breath and tries again. “Seeing how Toots is rather busy at the moment, I am simply going to give you the 411 here. Heather was hungry… Heather was stinky… Heather went to make something to eat only to leave it cooking on the stove while she went to take her shower. Naturally, as with any food left on the stove too long, it began to overcook.”


“Unfortunately Heather didn’t go back to cooking and soon the spaghetti was in flames. Thankfully our hero in training is home and manages to call for help. Fire department arrives to save the day, puts the fire out and all is right in Pleasantview.”


“The girls still get along great. Even Tracy has gotten over her hate of dirty jokes. Either that or they stopped telling her the dirty jokes. Either way they eat together, play together and are happily boring Roo to near drama intervention.”
“Hey! No ad-libbing.”
“I’m surprised you don’t have a picture of Vicky making a snowman.”
“I don’t?” Shuffling papers can be heard off screen followed by a photographer getting fired. “Hmm, that’s a shame.”


“Just about the time when Roo was ready to throw in the proverbial towel and give in to drama temptation, it happened.” Ruyb bites her lip and tilts her head. “No, I’m not talking about that; no one cares what I’ve been up to.”
The off camera voice sighs, another chuckles, once more a photographer is fired.
Ruyb brings the focus back to the update. “I’m referring to the drama that one sim managed to create for the household, the drama so intense the household will never be the same again. In one simple move she managed to rock the whole asylum to an extent even Roo was left in awe.”


“You see… Christina passed out. Christina passed out on her way to bed. Only it isn’t that simple. Things never are. Christina passed out on her way to bed having left a pastry in the oven. That of course isn’t the end of things. That too is simple. Alas, Christina passed out on her way to bed having left a pastry in the oven to burn shortly after 9 am.”


“Now I’m sure you’re asking what the significance is about the time. Yes any time is a bad time for a kitchen fire but gentle readers, Toots leaves for work…” Ruyb pauses for affect, “at 9 am.”


“The first to start the ‘ack, fire’ dance is Tracy and Magic. Not to be out done, they are soon joined by Vicky and Heather. The four dance their ‘ack, fire’ dance to the beat only heard to a sim faced with an out of control fire and this, gentle readers, is an out of control fire.”


“The hungry flames quickly consumed the stove and licked the air in its hunt for more. Tile apparently burns in an asylum and it crept its way towards Tracy. As Roo yelled at the screen in vain for the silly sims to move out of the way, the dance continues.”


“As the flames spread, it claims its first victim. Tracy’s dance changes from the ‘ack, fire’ dance to the ‘my ass is on fire’ dance. The hungry flames are not sated by one sim and claims a second.”


“Undeterred Magic and Heather continue their dance in hopes of appeasing the fire. Grimmy has come to claim his prizes and still the girls ‘ack, fire’ dance.”


“The fire lives, it changes it shifts, it grows it dies and still the sims dance to its tune. Magic and Heather are joined by Deb, the trio continue to flounder and dance. Roo continues to beat her head against the monitor. Her new mantra of ‘no, no, no’ falls on deaf ears. The sims dance on ignoring her pleas. They dance to the fire, they dance the ‘ack, fire’ dance.”


“Just as you think the flame is finished, that the dance will end, its hunger brings it back. That’s right, gentle readers, the dance is not over. For now the one who started it all has at last woken. It is time for Christina to join the ‘ack, fire’ dance.


“The fire shifts, it consumes more, it changes pace and the girls move accordingly. Four girls remain to dance, four move to the song of the fire. The fire builds growing ever higher until the chime of the clock strikes three.”


“Huzzah she says, run Toots run! Call the fire department and save who you can. Toots dutifully runs in but is called by the siren song of the fire. Ignoring the head banging noises of Roo she runs in to the flames. Yes, gentle readers, Toots ran in to the flame. Yet our hero in training did not just burn, she danced.”


“Every attempt to sway the hero towards the phones was thwarted by the flames call. To punish her further the flame claimed another. Our hero in training did her best to take her back but the flame won again.”


“Through gritted teeth, screaming and fussing, Roo managed to coerce our hero away from the fire long enough to make the call for rescue. The flame was enraged. How dare she call the fire department? To show it has no fear, the flame grabbed for another! Christina yelped and danced her heart out.”


“Fire department to the rescue! Mitch came in time to save our Christina. The flame was so angry it grabbed Magic. Only it was no match for the men in uniform. The firemen handled the fire with ease. After hours of dancing the ‘ack, fire’ dance the ladies are exhausted, smelly and hungry.”



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